It is interesting to me to see this beautiful story of mine unfold. It is neat to be a witness of the small little pieces that begin to fit together to make the puzzle whole. There is a part of my story that I have never shared before. I was reminded of it yesterday as I sat and visited with a dear friend who was used by God to be a part of this beautiful story! Her name is Jenn and she is a faithful and obedient woman of God. I say this because, if she was not obedient to God when He placed on her heart what He wanted her to pray for me, perhaps a different story would be being told. She was obedient when it did not make sense to her and when she had no idea of the beautiful story that was about to take place in my life! Allow me to share her part with you now.
Shortly after hearing the news that Erik had died, (even before the funeral people!) God told Jenn to pray that a man would come into my life for me to love and be a wife to! You see, Jenn just knew in her heart that I was created to be a wife and God kept confirming that to her! That is what I do best and love the most! She is so right!!! After Erik died I was so lost and so sad. I LOVED being his wife! I loved serving him, caring for him, and loving him. It was my deepest passion! So Jenn was troubled for me. Even though to her it did not make sense or feel appropriate to pray that prayer for me at the very beginning of my grief, she obeyed God and did it anyway! Yesterday as her and I were talking and reflecting on this, she had a huge revelation from God! It was an incredible moment in time that I will never forget! She was telling me how weird it was for her to be praying that for me because she knew at the time I would have been angry and would have refused to believe that there would ever be another man in my life for me to love. And just then it hit her! There was only a small window of time for my heart and then it would be closed forever and I probably would have driven off the road with my kids in the van. You see, during the early stages of losing Erik, that is exactly what I wanted to do. I felt that I could not go on another moment. I couldn't take watching my kids suffer such deep pain. Even when Norm was first in my life, I struggled with these thoughts. Jenn was overwhelmed at this thought, as was I. To the world,it probably seemed very sudden that I was seeing someone new. But to God, it was perfect timing! He knew what I needed when I needed it! 40 days after Erik died, Norm came over to my house for the very first time. I felt something that very day. I was so scared by what I felt and I couldn't understand it. But you see!!!! God knew! He knew Norm and I were destined to be together! He knew that meeting him and falling in love with him needed to happen when it did! 40 days!!!!!!! To those of you who are Bible scholars, you will see how significant this number is! Looking this up online I found this about the number 40: It is related to a time of testing and ends with a blessing! Wow! Think about that for a minute! Jenn had no idea what God was doing in my life! She had no idea that 40 days after Erik's death her prayers would be answered!
So the revelation Jenn had yesterday about a "window" into my heart was so very true! A 40 day window I guess you could say!!! That is why right away God pressed in hard on Jenn's heart to pray for me! A lesson we can all learn from this: if God places something on your heart to pray no matter how strange it is: PRAY IT! You may be just the vessel God is wanting to use in their story!!!!!! Thank you Jenn for being a HUGE part of my beautiful story!